And I am having a bad day. Dear God please please take this feeling away. I don’t wanna feel bad about J at all. I am sorry for everything and sorry that I got involved with him but please take this feeling away. I beg of you. I can’t stand to see him every day and not be with him. It fickin hurts man and what have I done to deserve this? Pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee I am tired of feeling bad. Its been three months nowwwwwwwwww and I need to move on. They say ask and so shall receive and so I am asking pleaseeee I wanna be free and happy and not miserable that I feel every now and then and no expectations pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. Just let me be happy pleaseeeeee. Dear God pleaseeeeeeeeeeeee I want this pining to go awayyyyyyyy Gawddddddddd. I don’t wanna feel anything. If I knew it would hurt so much I never would have. I am begging you to make me feel normal again. I thought everything was alright until yesterday when I broke down again. There seems to be no solution but to move on. I can’t run away. I have to stay right here alone and see him each day so pleaseeeeee make me stronger and help me. God I ask you for your help. Please help me. Please please help me.